Girls Can Solve Their Own Problems


We should never do for children what they can do for themselves. Girls can and do work through their own friendship problems — we should trust them to learn and grow through their experiences. The girls who have these problem-solving skills can use them for a lifetime!

So what can you do to empower girls to solve issues from a young age? You can instill confidence and problem solving skills in girls by being reassuring when friends clash. Remove yourself from their emotional drama, and take the opportunity to talk about these three concepts:

Conflict is normal and friendship problems are common. Rather than playing into the drama of friendship problems, make the situation matter-of-fact. Try using yourself as a point of reference to let them know, “Oh, yeah, I know what that’s like. I’ve had that happen to me, too.” Then they’ll realize that conflict is part of everyday life.

Problems can be solved. Girls can learn that even though they have a disagreement, it doesn’t have a stay a disagreement. We can teach them to ask questions to resolve arguments and issues. We should work with girls to improve their listening skills so they understand another girl’s point of view. Tone of voice also plays a role in good communication.

We’re here to help, not solve. By showing faith in girls and their problem-solving abilities, we adults show them that we trust them. Make sure they know your door is open if they need help.

Let’s make a pact. Let’s stop swooping in to solve problems for our girls. Trust in their abilities! Be available to them. Nurture their social intelligence and communication skills to create independent problem solving, and you’ll be taking a huge leap toward fostering well-balanced, confident girls. What could be a better gift for the girl in your life?

© 2011 A Way Through, LLC

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EZINE OR WEB SITE? You can, as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Female friendship experts Jane Balvanz and Blair Wagner publish A Way Through, LLC’s Guiding Girls ezine. If you’re ready to guide girls in grades K – 8 through painful friendships, get your FREE mini audio workshop and ongoing tips now at www.AWayThrough.com

Leave a Reply

Untitled Document When Girls Hurt Girls™ Parent Pack

Do you feel unequipped to help your daughter or students navigate painful friendships?

Finally, the instruction manual you need to help your Kindergarten – Grade 8 daughter or students find their way through painful friendships

Listen to the program introduction here.

When Girls Hurt Girls™ is a home practice guide for parents who want to help their hurting daughters, but don’t know where to start. It's also PERFECT for use in school or small group settings.

Through loving discussions and role-play exercises, your daughter or students will connect with their personal power and gain the confidence to resolve conflicts and attract the right kind of friendships to their lives.

REMEMBER: Works great for educators and group/team leaders too!  

Untitled Document

Do you need help in guiding your daughter through a difficult friendship situation?

Finally, 1-on-1 personalized help is available to assist you in guiding your daughter through her friendship problems now!

Introducing a new way to get support…

Our new Quick Assist program has been developed for parents who want help that’s tailored to their specific situation. Through no-nonsense strategy sessions, you will gain clarity on what to say to your daughter, what not to say, and how you can become a source of inspiration and support for her.

REMEMBER: Works great for educators and group/team leaders too!  
Click here
to learn more about the Quick Assist package.